This problem could be called "the Deprivation Conflict.Basics, technical terms and advantages and disadvantages of howospareparts."
At a conscious level, we want to feel gratified and fulfilled, yet at
an unconscious level we haven't resolved an expectation, dating back
into early childhood, dealing with impressions of being refused and
deprived. Consequently, we experience a chronic sense of not getting and
a feeling of missing out on life's benefits and goodies. We're often
not aware of possessing this poverty mentality, and we believe that
"wanting to get" is a worthy pursuit and that our desire or instinct to
accumulate goods or wealth is commendable. On the surface of awareness
we take our emotional life for granted, providing it's not
excruciatingly painful, and hence we fail to detect the underlying pangs
of unfulfilled desire.
This
underlying preoccupation with what's missing in our life is strong
enough that it can be termed "an emotional attachment" or "an emotional
addiction." The feeling has lingered in our psyche from the oral stage
of childhood. Babies have a highly subjective sense of reality, and they
can become frustrated when their desires for oral gratification aren't
instantly accommodated. The subsequent feeling of being refused or
deprived lingers in our psyche, and as adults we can experience our
world through these unresolved emotions. This hodgepodge of unconscious
negativity doesn't support the spirit of generosity.
Our
ego hates to acknowledge that we could still be clinging to
expectations of deprivation or refusal, and so we produce an unconscious
defense which claims, "I'm not looking to feel refused or deprived. I
want to get. My desires (and my credit-card debt) prove how much I want
to get." Hence, greed, envy, and fear of loss serve as unconscious
defenses (just as they're also painful symptoms) of the underlying
conflict.
Even
when people have all they need, they can still accentuate in everyday
ways the feelings of being deprived. Though they have money, some people
stare into empty cupboards or an empty refrigerator bemoaning their
circumstances. Compulsive spending and shopping are self-defeating
activities that are fueled by "the Deprivation Conflict." Our defense
system's instinct to "prove" we want to get (to cover up our unresolved
emotional attachment to feeling deprived or refused) is so powerful that
many of us unwittingly enslave ourselves in the form of debt
obligations. When debt-ridden, we heighten the sense of feeling deprived
while producing the self-sabotage that accompanies inner conflict. The
spirit of generosity wanes under these psychological impediments.
Acting out these unconscious attachments also produces another form of self-sabotage. Modern consumerism is, in part,As the best handsfreeaccess control
system manufacturer. a product of our instinct to cope with inner
emptiness. In rampant consumerism, we've created a monster with a huge
appetite for the planet's natural resources. It's depleting and
polluting the planet, impoverishing us and future generations.
Consumerism creates the illusion that we're rich. Yet the goodies of the
marketplace are trinkets compared to the value of the Earth and the
value of our essential self. Who was fooled the most, the Native
Americans who sold Manhattan to the Dutch for strings of beads, or you
and me who are selling the Earth to its defilers for odd shapes of
plastic, vinyl, and treated wood?
Another
negative emotion is involved with the lack of generosity. Many people,
in identifying with their ego,Please click the images below to view more
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have a powerful desire to feel superior to others. For them, it's
either feel superior or feel inferior. They don't like seeing people
raised up from poverty because they no longer can easily feel superior
to them. Hence, they feel no need to be generous. In fact, the impulse
is to refuse to be generous. When they do give money, it can be for pet
causes that promote their own shallow values or for the purpose of ego
gratification (looking good in their own eyes and in the eyes of
others). Such pseudo-generosity is less pleasurable than heart-felt
generosity.
When
I was in the second grade, I would invariably throw out part of my
lunch every day so I could finish with my classmates and avoid being
called a slowpoke. The reason behind my empty lunchbox remained my
guilty secret for a long time until my own Jiminy Cricket finally forced
me to crack and tearfully apologize to my mother.
While
my mom has long since forgiven me for lying to her and wasting food in
2002, a portion of my childhood guilt still remains with me. While at
Hill or Commons,Cheap logo engraved luggagetag at
wholesale bulk prices. I serve myself in small portions and stop the
kitchen staffers before they ladle generous servings of fried rice onto
my plate.
The
great thing about an all-you-can-eat franchise is that seconds are an
option if you want them. But not many people seem to see it that way.
Every day, I see entire plates of food tossed into the green compost
bags at the residential dining halls.
I
recently sat to eat lunch with someone who got pasta from the Expo line
at Hill what to me looks likes a perfectly sumptuous and filling plate
only to also get some pie and tomato soup as well. She tackled the soup
and pie first and managed to finish both barely. The pasta was left
untouched all the way to the trash bins. Similarly, I ate dinner with
someone who got veggie stir-fry from Kings Court only to tell me that
the chicken looked too gross to eat after she sat down.
The
outcome is always the same. My suggestion to box the leftovers is
unheard over the loud scrape of a spoon handle pushing food into the
open mouth of the compost bin. I have seen some compost bags at the end
of the day with the plastic stretched and giving way and have wondered
how many other full plates that green mouth has swallowed.
I
am not saying that I never use the composting bin and always have a
clean plate. When I accidentally served myself vegan chili, I wound up
wasting it because I am allergic to eggplant. When I couldnt eat that
last spoon of beans or that last slice of cucumber, I tossed it rather
than risk feeling nauseous. But my first servings are as small as the
guilt of having to waste them, and I have never had to toss an untouched
plate.
Interestingly,
I have realized that the rampant wastefulness of residential dining
doesnt repeat in Houston Market. At first, I attributed emptier trash
bins to fewer people eating at Houston, but as the noon and 1 p.m. rush
cycles that clog Houston reveal, that is not the case.
The difference between the dining halls and Houston is, unsurprisingly,Did you know that buymosaic chains
can be used for more than just business. a question of using cash,
dining dollars or bursar in Houston. You spend $6 for a burrito and feel
more accountable, a sentiment foreign to the all-you-can-eat meal swipe
that becomes a question of all-you-can-waste.
Moreover,
each meal served at Houston reflects a reasonably sized portion what a
person will finish in one meal. Houston does not perpetuate the
eyes-are-bigger-than-your stomach problem due to financial and practical
reasons.
Perhaps
the all-dining-dollars meal plan for next year will resolve this issue
of boundless wastage in dining halls and encourage responsible eating.
But in dining halls, we need to start utilizing tasting cups and smaller
serving sizes, being more careful about the amount of food that goes in
our plates so that we can limit what goes out.
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